Send Me All Your Spoiled Eggs

A lovely family in my town sent their child to school today KNOWING THEIR CHILD HAD HEAD LICE. I gather they did not want to waste any vacation time taking care of their child, since they'd just returned from a vacation (where their kid got lice).

So many facets of this baffle me, especially since there was an outbreak of lice in the fall and we had to endure a month of Head Lice Lockdown at the school, so we know what we're in for. During Head Lice Lockdown, all personal belongings must be secured in large, sealed garbage bags which are kept in the school hall, not in the classroom. Each time a seal is breached, the bag is discarded and another bag must be used. The school custodial staff must de-louse every inch of the school. Concerned Parents will hire Lice Specialists and host head-check parties (I'm not kidding - we got invited to three last fall).

The school nurse will whip out her cheery notes to send home each day, reminding us all that Head Lice Can Happen To Anyone, Head Lice Does Not Indicate Socioeconomic Status, People With Head Lice Are Not Unclean, etc. Great pains are taken by administration to prevent anyone knowing which child(ren) is(are) affected. In this case, I imagine the protection will be doubled as I am absolutely certain that if any of us find out who the rude, socioeconomic equals are that sent their louse-ridden child to school, we will all go egg their house.

Send your kid to school with hives! Hives are not contagious. Send your kid to school with a cold! We have tissues. DON'T SEND YOUR KID TO SCHOOL WITH HEAD LICE. We do not want to nit-bomb our house and burn all our sheets. Excuse me, I have to go scratch my head.