What happens when a nearly 40-pound boy leans on a table leaf that has been secured in the "up" position by his five-year-old brother? If you said, "Blood comes out," you win! He was unhappy at first but when he calmed down and noticed the marked resemblance he bore to a real hockey player, he was much happier.
What happens when Mama moves things around in a room and then, later, crashes through on her way to the bathroom without turning on a light? If you said, "Blood comes out," you missed this time. She does get some impressive heat in the hand she mashed onto the rocker and a nice lump on one knee, which Ross treated with the Boo-Boo Fish (thanks, Wisa!) and a bag of frozen peas (not pictured).
It's too bad we're all so well padded while playing hockey. If we could attain respectable bruises at the rink, we wouldn't need to get creative with tables and bags of donation clothes!
P.S. Wings D won our first game of the season! I didn't score but got one assist so was not entirely decorative.